40 Top Shelf Memes for High Rollers

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Dec 10, 2023 10:00 PM EST

I've never gambled in a casino setting, but I imagine it's a thrill. That is until you lose all your money. I had a weekly poker game with my gal pals in college, and the buy-in was $5, but that doesn't mean things didn't get heated. There would often be yelling, swearing, and all sorts of good-natured rah-rah. I went to Vegas when I was underage, and the most fun thing to do there was people-watch. 

There are so many different types of people that stroll through the strip, from families to drunk bachelorettes to world-weary showgirls. We would just watch the street for hours, captivated by all the wacky, outlandish characters. These memes would fit right in on the Las Vegas strip, some flashy, some a little bit crude, and some with a whole lot of flavor. Just don't lose your shirt. 

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  • 01
    "I hope you in a better mood when I get back." Me when they get back:
    via tarwen
  • 02
    silversora: "Dave.." off Shaun I am taking a picture." "DAVE." 195 378,898 notes
    via tarwen
  • 03
    Ted Travelstead @trumpetcake be ur own secret santa with ambien and amazon
    via @trumpetcake
  • 04
    Having a girlfriend is cool until you realise how much you have to feed them... Thurlovinub
    via tarwen
  • 05
    High resolution image of Jupiter
    via tarwen
  • 06
    Eileen Mary O'Connell @i_Lean Thinking about the time that I said that I was distantly related to Marie Curie and a guy explained "It's pronounced Mariah Carey" 1:08 PM - 9/1/20 Twitter for iPhone .
    via @i_Lean
  • 07
    maryammonster zoe-dee+ theonesthatcomeeasy: harlequin19bee: sopranomonroe: sxizzor: I CAN'T STOP #IT'S BACK 213,337 notes Source: butthorn butthorn: I just attended the best passion of the Christ play. As they were "nailing" Jesus to the cross the entire thing broke. No one knew what to do and it got quiet. Finally one of the guards on stage said "You get out of it this time Jesus" i LAUGHING NOBODY LOOK AT ME
    via butthorn
  • 08
    When the food two tables away smells really good...
    via tarwen
  • 09
    m @Love_bug1016 for my funeral please make sure the dress i'm wearing has pockets 4:08 PM 3/5/21 - Twitter for iPhone ...
    via @Love_bug1016
  • 10
    Lee @leemc87 This is honestly the worst and most upsetting before and after I've ever seen jive in moment 2:02 PM 2/25/21 Twitter for iPhone ● SAL : ●●
    via @leemc87
  • 11
    Couldn't get rid of my lice so I put them in jail
    via tarwen
  • 12
    NASA: "We need you to find water on Mars." Me: No problem...
    via tarwen
  • 13
    Rob N Roll @thegallowboob Puking Grogu keeps your teeth clean FLUORIDE AN 3:35 PM 3/6/21. Twitter for iPhone . : Colgate
    via @thegallowboob
  • 14
    cluedont @cluedont My brother just shared his online shopping issues in our family WhatsApp group. ON Re 10 That's the last time I use the internet to buy a desk. 2:35 PM 3/6/21. Twitter for iPhone : 22:19
    via @cluedont
  • 15
    POWER greymichaela PLAY KYAN 19 lymeandcoconut Follow REI tilthat Follow TIL TIL that bananas are slightly radioactive due to certain caesium isotopes. Therefore you should never eat more than 600 bananas per second to minimze the risk of a harmful radiation dose. via reddit.com POWER greymichaela There goes my Friday night
    via greymichaela
  • 16
    Me optimistically thinking that since we have the past to learn from, that humans have the knowledge to make better decisions Me watching humans use the same idiot logic to justify making the same bad decisions today as they did in the past NOW
    via tarwen
  • 17
    When you're hungry but don't want to leave your bed to go eat: C'mon, do gluconeogenesis
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  • 18
    IN CASE OF EMERGENCY PLEASE SELECT BUTTON BELOW Major Catastrophe Siren Moderate Disaster Alarm Standard Crisis Bell Minor Mishap Whistle Awkward Incident Buzzer
    via tarwen
  • 19
    Hulon Jenkins vor 1 Monat Okay so at 1:48 they are in Egypt. And at 1:59 they are in Greece. Egypt is 1,596 km away from Greece. That means they must have traveled 1,596 km in 11 seconds, or an average of 145,090 m/s or about 324,557 mph. Keep in mind the Apollo missions reentry speed was about 24,606 mph. And they had a heat shield to protect from the extreme heat such a speed would cause.Aladdin and Jasmine are wearing regular clothing, (which does not protect from atmospheric reentry) and the
    via tarwen
  • 20
    Ilieo: holy I we have our windows open and we heard a blood curling scream so naturally I went to look out the window because wow is someone getting stabbed?? and it is just my neighbour on his knees staring at a KFC chicken bucket spilt all over his driveway
    via Ilieo
  • 21
    Rodney Lacroix @RodLacroix Constantly losing my wife in the grocery store and playing the Find My Phone sound on her phone each time is why I don't have to go shopping with her anymore. 12:18 PM 3/8/21. Twitter Web App ... .
    via @RodLacroix
  • 22
    Video quality from Mars: Video quality from security camera:
    via tarwen
  • 23
    Elaena @elaenawojtowicz My boyfriend just asked me if he could borrow one of HIS shirts I stole from him You know what, yes you can. Thank you for asking properly.
    via @elaenawojtowicz
  • 24
    Airzooka Air Blaster- Blows 'Em Away - Air Toy for Adults and Children Ages 6 and Older - Blue Q: Can i fart in it and shoot it at my wife across the room? Answer this question A: I can confirm this. I received one of these as a Christmas gift while deployed. Naturally, it only took a few minutes for two of my Soldiers to attempt firing a fart through it. The key is to have the "gunner" and hold the weapon while the "loader" does his thing. It took nearly two full seconds for the blast to cross
    via tarwen
  • 25
    wittyidiot @stephenszczerba If true crime has taught me anything it's that eventually my partner is going to murder me, so know if I ever peacefully fall asleep next to you it's bc I love you, I've made peace with it & I hope you get away with it
    via @stephenszczerba
  • 26
    Bob Janke @Bob_Janke Extreme Ironing Bureau Extreme ironing Sport 8:13 AM 2/7/21 Twitter Web App Extreme ironing is an extreme sport in which people take ironing boards to remote locations and iron items of clothing. According to the Extreme Ironing Bureau, extreme ironing is "the latest danger sport that combines the thrills of an extreme outdoor activity with the satisfaction of a well-pressed shirt." Wikipedia . More images < ...
    via @Bob_Janke
  • 27
    Roxi Horror @roxiqt Men, women don't care if you're tall, athletic or rich. All women want is for you to show up at their home on time with a lasagna & a raccoon wearing a tiny backpack full of snacks. Then you leave so they can share the lasagna with the raccoon. That's it. It's not rocket science. 7:41 PM - 2/17/20 - Twitter for Android
    via @roxiqt
  • 28
    I am am forever disappointed that a group of calquids is not squad. M
    via tarwen
  • 29
    when you get on the bus and the bus driver has started driving before you've got to your seat 8131
    via tarwen
  • 30
    one-time-i-dreamt I was in the shower with my boyfriend and he tried to convince me that a bottle of shampoo was a sandwich. It got super heated and I was I, so I yelled at him to " EAT IT THEN". He proceeded to eat the entire thing without breaking eye contact. deanwinchesters-sexuality Once again, read URLS icannotfindaunusedusername Thank you I was extremely confused They ONEWS in me first half, not gonna lie
    via one-time--dreamt
  • 31
    Due: 1 Yellow Curry Chicken 03/24/21 1:22 PM $12.00 Mild MY FRIEND CANNOT HANDLE SPICE. LIKE IT NEEDS TO BE WHITE WHITE PERSON MILD. LIKE MISSIONARY MILD. LIKE A PARTY WITH THE PROPEHET OF THE MORMON CHURCH MILD. 1 Yellow Curry $12.0
    via tarwen
  • 32
    Daughter: What has two hands and no legs? Me: I don't know. Daughter: I can't tell you until I've eaten the whole thing. (I look up in horror, then realize she's reading a joke off a popsicle stick and not done eating it yet.)
    via tarwen
  • 33
    If you can't hide a crime scene, just pretend you are a victim
    via tarwen
  • 34
    datarep THE LOCATION OF EVERY STAR ON A NATIONAL FLAG Density map of stars on national flags nitramgniknilra Me vision when I get bump on me noggin Source: reddit.com STAR COUNT ------
    via datarep
  • 35
    jvharris_1965 @jvharris_1965 I could be mistaken, but I think they gave me someone else's blood pressure prescription. I better ask my wife. CAUTION: Federal law prohibits transfer of thes any person other than the patient for whom p INSERT FOUR TABLETS (800 MCG) VAGINALLY IN THE LEFT EAR ONE TIME DOSE. REPEAT IN 24 HOURS. MISOPROSTOL 200MCG Substituted for Cytotec &white scored round tablet SIDE 1: 161 n SENDC 43386-0161-06 NO REFILLS Mfg Gav 12:04 PM 4/27/21 Twitter for iPad ● Qty 8 EA
    via @jvharris_1965
  • 36
    pervocracy Fun statistical fact: Cows are about 300 times more likely to kill you than coyotes. Minor sidenote to statistical fact: If it was common for people to keep several hundred coyotes on their property and routinely chase them into a corral and handle them, this statistic would be different. ajaegerpilot #thats why presentation of data matters #to prevent misinformation Source: pervocracy 17,340 notes A
    via pervocracy
  • 37
    Whenever someone abbreviates Robert Downey Jr's name to RDJR, this is what I imagine:
    via tarwen
  • 38
    Amy @amyis_trying there's no time to explain. get in the pea. ADY 727
    via @amyis_trying
  • 39
    macusers: [lawyer voice] the prosecution makes a compelling argument, but have you. considered this *puts middle finger up*
    via macusers
  • 40
    stumpybelham Follow charlesoberonn Follow "I wish ancient people preserved their writing and artifacts better" I write in electronic signals on a piece of hardware that can't retain its efficacy for more than a few decades. charlesoberonn Follow Time to laser-print my entire blog on titanium plates and bury them underground. stumpybelham Follow brb etching my one-star yelp review of the sheet metal supplier that sold us on a granite slab copper 41,794 notes A tl
    via stumpybelham

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